he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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