Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
