What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
