Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
