That's intense
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Randomize
