We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
