I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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