He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
