do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
jump out the window naked night went bad
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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