so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
