U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
