so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
3pm strippers are depressing
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
