Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
