You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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