I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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