the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
