We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
