What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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