pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
