please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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