so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize