For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
