I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
