How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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