That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
