what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
