Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
