He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
