I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
