Sry I called you an 8
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
