I feel like abortions should bother me more
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
