Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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