I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize