We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
