I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
