I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize