Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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