this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
