i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
