whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I am available for nakedness
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