i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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