he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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