As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
