you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize