We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize