I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize