But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Who wears a wallet chain?!
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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