she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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