I want to stick my p in your. b.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Randomize
