What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
